Monday, December 7, 2009

How Much Does A Weave Or Sew In Extensions Cost?

Papi under siege

intense weeks, this, with my partner who has appeared and disappeared from the house like a sad old ghost, driven by anxiety to escape from everything and everyone. At least there were the first to mercenarine escort patients back nostalgic flights of his dementia, and evenings spent shell rosaries and pictures of Bush macerarsi with the official video of his jokes at the top of the world acted on him like a sedative. Now that you have imposed a modest life conducted at home (also to prevent the Communist press instill in court that deals with his divorce fantasiosissimo the theorem that he's a pimp), it is still in its plumbing vent heats Waving bulb abroad.

In fact this week has begun with the passion of traveling Belarus, for his mental clock stopped in 1963 has yet to be a destination for sex tourism on the cheap. Luckily our house was the monitor lizard , to fulfill social obligations accompanying the elderly megalomani nei quali gli sono stati commutati gli ultimi mesi di pena. È stato lui che, vedendo papi dimenare furiosamente i lombi nel tentativo di chiudere una valigia stracolma di penne biro su cui si era seduto, lo ha bloccato. "Ahó, te devi convince 'na bona vorta che 'sti cazzo de communisti nun ce stanno ppiù. Se so' convertiti tutti! È fi-ni-ta! E caccia 'sta penna che nun te serve a gnente! Portate du assegni piuttosto che tutto er monno è paese e li paradisi dell'este ando annavamo da ggiovani a scopà in cambio de du bbiro se li è magnati 'a globalizzazzione".

È crudele far rimpiombare un vecchio nostalgico nella realtà prosaica del giorno d'oggi; è addirittura sadico se nel farlo si usa il vernacolo. Ma, come dice il varano: "quanno ce vo' ce vo'". E così per la missione nella Russia Bianca papi è partito con la valigia vuota e il portafogli gonfio. Due giorni dopo avrebbe riportato a casa la stessa valigia ma zeppa di documenti ingialliti del KGB, cortesemente donatigli dal tiranno Lukaschenko, il post-comunista schifato da tutte le cancellerie del mondo ma leccato avidamente dal mio coinquilino, che a furia di lisciare Putin e Gheddafi ormai ha meno papille gustative di un esapode .

A dire il vero la notizia dell'importazione dei dossier comunisti aveva preceduto il ritorno del mio ancello domestico, mandando in fibrillazione più a friend of PD. Telesina had had to take one day at home to quell the spirits by phone:


DRIIIN * *
- Hello?
- ...
- Baffino , hello! How are you?
- ...
- Yes, Lukashenko gave him some souvenir of the Cold War, you know he does this kind of collection of memorabilia ...
- ...
- But do not worry ...
- ............
- yes I know you're young ...
- .................................
- yes I know that you have a career ahead ...
- ...
- What do you want to be still outside the former Soviet archives about you? And then you know that fifteen years we have in hand all the most incriminating about you and we never pulled it out ...
- ...
- Of course, you're very quiet! And say hello to my little nephew. Of 'Did you see that bell' interview statesman who has released! "Defending the processes" Andreotti reminded me young and I have come his eyes moist. I've always said I Doroteo blood that flows in the veins! Hello, dear. Force Bersani. Hello. Hello. * CLICK *


This was followed eighteen other calls like that. And each of those friends seasoned by hard communist past, Telesina was able to find a good word of reassurance. At the end we can say that the viaggio all'est sia stato un successo, con un ricompattamento del fronte maggioranza-opposizione, e con quei reperti da guerra fredda che sono foraggio fresco per il quotidiano "Trent'anni fa" diretto da Citizen Bergum , specializzato in scandali del primo dopoguerra . Inoltre in Bielorussia il mio convivente ha potuto continuare la sua ricognizione nei possibili stati-sponda su cui rimbalzare qualora scattasse il piano B .

Ma al ritorno lo attendevano brutte sorprese. Per prima l' accusa di assolutismo mossagli dal suo nemico pubblico numero uno, e tutto solo perché papi di recente aveva rivelato di volersi fare un nuovo trapianto tricologico modello "re Sole". Quel tale è always too good, too good, too high with too much hair, more aplomb constitutional grandfather Swiss Napolitano, a normal family and not a trial: Dwarven my partner seems like a Martian. He even convinced that will blow your Nobel prize for peace just when he is on the verge of conquering and now that he has already made room for attendees in addition to trophies for Milan. Telesina for the time convinced him to approach a two-faced: he does so without prejudice to strafe the enemy from his three newspapers, the day after their critics, at home says the film "The Exorcist" when he speaks of him with his loyalists, then you inject liters of botulinum toxin under the skin and it leaves the house with a smile foam.

The second surprise was the interrogation of Spatuzza. To hear the voice of the penitent has also interrupted the council of ministers had called on purpose to skip the hearing process to Mills. "How," asked a shocked Ius Feratu , "how can this guy has come to give evidence in court when we knew for weeks what he said?". The diaphanous legislates modulated with lombardoveneta chant: "But we are opposed in tribunaaale ...". "But what do I care! Possible that the coffee in prison was known to them only at the time of Andreotti?". The waxy leguleo is was shocked by the emergence inconsistent and tried to answer that he does not have jurisdiction over this because she drinks only green tea but popes took out a constitution and Ius Feratu kicking a scream, has turned into a bat and flew straight into his study shaped coffin.

The third devastating surprise was the participation of so many beautiful girls to the event No-B-Day. For my partner was as if the world had collapsed on him. His whole system of values \u200b\u200btriangular summarized years of esoteric Masonic lodge in his private brothel and 2 based on the vertices adjoining MONEY - PUSSY - TV, he seemed to evaporate in a moment. "But how ..." asked which referred to the TV a few pictures of the purple tide, "... all these chicks have been free to express ... and without any TV coverage ... against me that I love the other half of the sky and a Latin lover from the hair flowing and I could cover them and make them money or at least tissue minister? ". Then he retired in a cataleptic state that is better for me to make him do things to help telepathically.

He awakened improvidently IQ , spat upon his enthusiastic new discovery in the face: " Eufreka , eufrekfa ," shouted waving a picture in his hand, "the ciabbfiamo prfove, ciabbfiamo the prfove che 'a mafia ce sta trfamando contrfo!". Papi lo ha guardato senza tradire aspettative. "Ahò guarfi qua pfreside", ha ripreso il pitagorico, mettendogli la foto sotto il naso, "se vede chfiaramente che Nicchi ciaveva 'a ferpa viola quanno l'amo arrestfato! Ahòf quello se ne stava annandfo a manifestà contrfo de noi!".

Per una volta IQ aveva fatto una scoperta bastevolmente intelligente per gli organi di comunicazione del mio coinquilino. E infatti è stata subito rilanciata dal tenebroso e luciferino mago di Az .

Sunday, November 29, 2009

Amsterdamer Rolling Tobacco

Draft

Sarà anche la prima aria di Natale in arrivo, ma negli ultimi tempi c'è troppo movimento dentro and around the house. Yesterday was the turn of some pretty girls , radunatesi for a test under our balcony. My roommate was not home, occurred when the sorceress and umbrellas are unlined lips of such a red Santa Claus knock suffered by the victim, already at its lowest resistance to the prolonged period of penance imposed by his chastity rehabilitator sexual Fornicon .

was up to the policemen guarding the house rescue readily with salts of cocaine, which returns immediately to the conscious world. He had not yet put up his unerring instinct latin lover already forced him to pull off irresistible seductive weapons: with his trembling hand began to sign blank checks to dozens of little women there, in the vain hope of bringing about in the house at least a couple. Only the heroism of the civil police, clipping him and dragged him up the stairs of the building, prevent him from squandering a fortune.

now we all compulsively try and use any means to achieve the coveted fur. Even coming to exchange valuable pieces of his government ministers of the caliphate for anonymous ex-Soviet, as if they were stickers. Today I was sharpening his nails on the cellophane that harness the human dimensions of a new statue in just recapitataci lounge when I heard death rattle. I nell'involucro enough digging to discover the terrified eyes of Don Bondio , packed and ready to be shipped to Turkmenistan. I have signed the first guancione with my claws (settlement of accounts for an old story of abuse suffered by me pseudolirici ) and I then closed the gift bag: I never interferes with the course of international diplomacy.

Recently there has been a great rumor relations between the mafia and political power. As my partner is the most powerful man in Italy for years and has also hosted a Mafia boss in the house, it was foreseeable that some newspapers would plunged headlong in the easy equation. Less predictable was that repentant Mafia begin to "sing" to explain the uvula past associations between him, his accomplices and the honor society. "Why suddenly all this chatter?" Asked a little popes' disbelief. The Minister spellicciato straziagiustizia was unable to answer because he was too busy to get the abacus that only 1% of the processes will be required by law short trial.

Telesina proposed to directly ask the doctor . But it is not easy, because he is a fugitive. Don Maccieddu was then used to hold a conversation on Skype, that can not be intercepted by the ordinary courts. Right from his first words, the doctor seemed a little angry:

"What mminghia vuliti?"
"Good Doctor" and greeted Telesina reverent, "Kiss the hands symbolically."
"Speak, speak, kiss me, ca nun schifìu me. Vuliti Ca?"
"Look, this president was asked here have heard this ... sorry, this Spatuzza, that statement is doing ... So, we wanted to see if he is just a maverick, one on which you could maybe put some pressure , we say cross, you understand me doctor, just to get him to keep some 'more of confidentiality on some important issues Status ... or if some change is taking place in the general strategy, if that is not really Spatuzza but it could only have someone behind him who sent him out with a message ... we would like to understand first of all, here. "
" The message is that there nuatri nun sentìemu jappresentati most out of your chair. Chillu did fessu mezzu mundu with its promises. And u intantu 41 a nun there was still raised.
"But there seemed to be coming to meet him ... with the tax shelter, interceptions ... "
" But chidde are all things that are mainly aimed at him! Where's the money for the bridge over stjetto u? Peaks including the nun ancestral jeati mafia in the law on the process bbreve? And a 41? When I told him that chiddu cornutu pelatu vuliva headlights jiapriri to Pianosa , my marriage took us nu mezzu infarct. Yet the closest I villagers arrested "
" I understand, of course, but a little at a time everything settles down ... We can not do everything at once ... "
" But all at once duviti headlights, altjimenti an award an order here and there, every month, people take a new plea for ingazzarsi. Duviti headlights jiforma a general of justice, one-off , Capitu? E nun chiste minghi ad personam Tappari holes for the processes of chiddu stjonzo "
" Please, keep a little 'respect for the elected by the people ... "
" Yes, elected with the votes and my money, though. Feel bbene ... "
" Yes sir ".
" You jipartire draft by Violante, Capitu? Chidda all goes well, opposition to the majority to vuatri and nuatri. Sure it takes time, but at least it puts a jiforma general all agree. You have to convince your cumpàri that chidda stjada is right. "
" Excuse me, let me ...", she tried to speak popes.
"And write them on the agenda of 41a, which chillu short memory chains!" * CLICK
*
"Allow me, since I'm not very familiar with the dead languages, I do not think that he well understood the question ... "
" He has already attacked the president, "said Telesina frowning." But do not worry, then I'll explain everything. Ah, look what the cat is back to torture Bondi.

Sunday, November 22, 2009

Expandable Shower Curtain Rod

Our plan B in the bunker

Always closed on the house, mostly alone, me and him. Now do two weeks of forced cohabitation in an atmosphere of overwhelming paranoia of persecution, from monoloqui redde rationem , onanism tire in front of videos and movies of old orgette love top of the Bush era, when politics was still a serious thing, is to export democracy to Iraq without worrying too much about the house own, and the revolutionaries of the right had not yet realized the coup to subvert the will of the sovereign people .

The good news is that at least we left the bunker to return to the palace of pleasure . A stock Messac provided by Don Maccieddu, the chief district of the Senate , has opened a corridor between the assailants, the crowd of the urban area: unemployed, without hope, students without funds, without trial judges , opponents without events, corrupted without corrupting , candidates without party leader , aspiring parties without leaders, bureaucrats without chair, hold social card without recharging. All disappointed, all with the same face bleak focused solely on him, waiting for the miracle promised but never happened, even if only one of its late holiday for life under the palm trees of a tropical paradise.

I had already spoken in the past and I confirm: I am For months now that popes are working secretly "plan B", which would take effect in case he could not impose the backbone of his constitutional reform ( process dead ; appointment of attorneys to draw from the lists of national and pizza service limit to four months unpaid, direct confirmation of the Prime Minister through a runoff with opposition figures of his choice, abolishes the office of President of the Republic by bloodless means, closure of public schools and setting up lessons only on digital terrestrial, reduction of the parliament group leaders the two poles, where the majority has more vote, appointing all members of Cosa Nostra for over twenty years in the Knights of Labour).

The "plan B" is to find a friendly country, welcoming atmosphere for weather and feminine, it can host and who is not an abject deference to international treaties, such as laws on extradition and money laundering di denaro sporco. Fino a poco tempo fa il paese più gradito era la Libia, abbastanza vicina per favorire un rapido ritorno in patria in testa a una flottiglia di panfili di evasori padani, nel caso le acque giudiziarie tornassero un giorno a calmarsi. Ma lui non sopporta di passare per numero due, e da quando Gheddafi gli ha radunato sotto il naso un gregge di 250 squinzie peninsulari over 1,70 m al prezzo di soli 60 euro a testa per una notte di chiacchiere sull'Islam (mentre a lui tocca scucire gettoni da mille euri per rintronare le escort con il racconto dei suoi G8), la Libia gli sembra un pollaio troppo angusto per lui e l'amico beduino.

Ultimamente stava crescendo il suo interesse per il Brasile, che oltre a essere una fabbrica naturale di gnocche e gnocchi assortiti, ha anche dimostrato di riuscire a nutrire simpatie politiche per i criminali comuni italiani. Ma il destino gli ha messo davanti un'altra Corte Costituzionale, che ha concesso l' estradizione dell'antiredentista Cesare Battisti, creando per lui uno scomodo precedente. Così, mentre tiene d'occhio le prossime mosse di Lula , non smette di cercare sul mappamondo. Per ultimo è finito fra gli emiri sauditi , a tastare il terreno giuridico del deserto.

La gita in Arabia mi ha regalato un po' di respiro, ma dopo due giorni lui era di nuovo qui. Anzi, ha perfino organizzato una colazione con alcuni dei suoi più finti assecondatori senza nemmeno consultarmi. È stata una noia vederlo strapazzare una volta di più il suo servo spellicciato , e rinfacciargli la sua nullità di mero prestanome passacarte. Dopo la scenata gli altri hanno continuato a sorseggiare il caffè in silenzio, lo sguardo fisso sul piattino, e io mi chiedevo quali di quelle facce meste avrei rivisto ancora a casa mia.

Sunday, November 15, 2009

When To Use A Kitchenaid Paddle



Ora viviamo nel bunker . È un vero contrappasso per il mio coinquilino, venerato chansonnier dell'italico stivale nonché miglior primo ministro della storia d'Italia nei ritagli di tempo, il fatto di essere costretto a non mettere più il nose out of the house, and abandon beautiful and Latvian companies Putin's Palazzo Grazioli to plug into the thick walls of Palazzo Chigi that he has always looked down, officially because there is a danger that some "isolated mythomaniac" he put the hands on him. He repeated that the mirror is not just alarmist fantasies of secret services, which conform to reasons of protocol. "Who would want it to hurt this man so generous?", He wonders aloud, giving himself of her. Certainly not the hundreds of suspects in Italy for corruption, extortion , fraud and aggravated injury that, thanks to the last hole space-time di Ius Feratu , da un giorno all'altro si troveranno i processi futuri già prescritti da anni.

È questo l'enigma che da settimane lo tormenta: chi può avercela con lui e perché? Di favori è una vita che ne dispensa a tutti, sempre attento a non discriminare nessuno. I complottardi non possono certo annidarsi nella corte di anonimi satrapi che è arrivata in parlamento a ingrassarsi solo grazie al suo nome. Nemmeno quei suoi amici siciliani possono volergliene, vista la legge contro le intercettazioni e le riforme contro la giustizia che gli si sta confezionando appositamente. La Chiesa poi non può proprio lamentarsi: i fondi per le scuole private sono gli unici che le forbici della Finanziaria not cut; my balio also finished with the orgies at the palace and when he is an irresistible desire to use the pump comes up with a diplomatic tour in Eastern Europe (Poland , Bulgaria, Russia ). Even the opposition has a complaint, given the support that my roommate is paying homage to his old playmate bicameral tended to earn him yet another armchair of a long career spent in service if scientifically itself. Indeed, between the two is a new passion, as evidenced by the dialogue below, propitiated dall'amorino Telesina . Certainly not the Baffino D'Addario, but the blue pills, you know, miracles do.



remains the riddle of who is plotting behind her, that not even a visit to the ex-KGB Putin was able to clarify. Of course the trip was not just unnecessary, as well as test the gadgets that the hydraulic vitalise the lower parts with two local gemellone, and those Svetlana Galina, the award winning 2009 Viagra Ural section, my partner is also back with suitcases full of new dossier on the Italian Communists of the '50s, a type of documents in the past has always proved effective in convincing those responsible the constitutionality of certain decrees. But the most urgent issue del nemico interno le spie russe non hanno aiutato, se si eccettua considerazioni fantapolitiche ispirate da una storia piena di rivoluzioni popolari, e hanno invitato a riflettere sui 250.000 che si sono iscritti al prossimo No Cav Day, alle 100.000 signore che hanno firmato l'appello "Non sono una donna a sua disposizione" su Repubblica, agli incazzati dell' Aquila e a qualche milione di disoccupati a casa. Fantapolitica, appunto.

Sunday, October 11, 2009

Puppy Throwing Up At Night

Caramba!



Il video musicale mi è stato inviato dai tre amici cileni nel riquadro, fratelli di padre diverso e grandissimi fan degli Inti-Illimani , oltreché, dal 7 ottobre scorso, della Corte Costituzionale italiana. L'omaggio ha parzialmente compensato la settimana bestiale passata con il mio coabitante. Egli è stato preda di una crisi in cui ha alternato pianti, canzoni di Apicella al pianoforte, orazioni sul comunismo sionista capeggiato dai golpisti Murdoch e De Benedetti sul lampadario, barzellette sugli Obama al balcone, insulti alle donne , filmini di Bush, confessioni spontanee , e pacche sulle proprie spalle al grido di "meno male che Silvio c'è". Ha persino provato a strapparsi i capelli d'acciaio, rischiando un pericoloso lifting craniale.

Se almeno il problema fosse stato solo lui! Per giorni qui a house was a bustle of people uncontrolled or less known: it seems that half of Italy has decided to pull out our rooms. To understand the gravity of the situation simply scroll through the list of lamentatores who came to kneel at the bedside of my roommate, as he received them lying on the sofa with zebra Roberto Cavalli black shirt by playboy chest open on a more flaccid than usual, and the smile fading a martyr next to the last pull. Besides the inevitable Telesina , now trading for the upholstery of our house, have spoken, in order of appearance: Gattomammone with son most intelligent and beautiful two druids drunk water from the Po porcellum more constitutional that maxillofacial surgeon, who has restored symmetry to the face of that Gattomammone; Malvenduti , the mechanical dog that tokens to be more than capable consistent ; Recycling , the longtime friend of of popes, more democratic than honest Spellicciato the video above, more knowledgeable of Justice on anti-mafia . Among them also many new faces and some tissue disguised as a minister, so that the procession would be too boring not to the landlord.

Cause all this chaos were those two stoats freeloaders still the other night here during a bacchanal worthy of Trimalchio, boasted of being able to drag their side judges still undecided on Lodo. Promises to be a lawyer. My roommate if he was drinking, and how, and why there was very bad. To no avail messages solidarity posthumous Fornicon and Kim Jong-il . Indeed, the first sent him into a rage even more: "He was right when he said that Tantardini is the most stupid of the world," he exclaimed. "He had to send a message of solidarity to Napolitano not only to me. If someone can think of no Ghedini, who has invented the award just for me! "

About the President: Lately I am just punishment. He's younger than willing to institutional clash. When the proposed President of the Republic had actually understood" the Bureau of bowling " (Chamber of Deputies) and already had been sensitive to that role quite sull'indeciso. The ladies when they lose it in your mouth can become aggressive. Now my roommate never fails to scare him and has become a game for him, threatening him with the clash between powers and his past pro-Soviet . So the old man called to apologize immediately after the vote of consultations, but my partner did not want to learn to speak. Worried, the old Stalinist who searched the banks of the Presidents of the Chambers, but even this is enough : the next day my roommate threatened him again. This morning the poor fellow has read an article in the newspaper-killer of Citizen Bergum, who accused him of simulated an illness not to meet pope, more or less as it had done last December skipping the meeting with the President on the pretext of back pain to jump on a Mandinka fabulous. The seasoned Communist has also tried this morning to assure him that the leg was really bad. But he had already left, to fetch tutti i fischi da solo a Messina .

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

150 Fixed Projector Screen

new nightmares, cloisters media, Nobel laureates and serves Italie

Questa volta (lo dico con un certo senso di colpa verso i gatti lettori) a tenermi lontano dal blog non è stata solo l'ansia giramondo del mio coinquilino, ma una prescrizione medica: il Dr. Randolf mi ha vietato di interessarmi e di scrivere dell'attività di papi per un mese, da quando gli incubi che hanno protagonista il mostruoso Telegatto hanno ricominciato ad perseguitarmi.

Poche sedute psicoanalitiche via internet sono bastate al luminare per capire il problema: sembra che per qualche ragione io abbia inconsciamente finito per identificare il mio balio con un tiranno prossimo alla caduta but ready to do anything to avoid it, including the censorship of the opinions differ by million dollar lawsuits, the ' formal abolition of the tax system, the right to corruption of judges, el' autoamnistia advance for each offense. Given these deep anxieties, even the most reassuring of editorial Pavolini-Minzolini that the doctor had even given successfully in the past, have more effect: the split between my tendency to compromise Gatteschi home and my cat worship for freedom is now exploded, and my doctor has imposed a drastic choice between the popes and the papal private audience. For a month I

therefore tried to ignore the public life of my balio and I must say that this seclusion has helped me. I have avoided the marathon of my roommate in the studio by dell'esapode purring voice, and I've thrown away hundreds of emails protesting gattocomunisti with me for moving Ballarò. I have not seen the fridge and delivery of great design earthquake victims to the few who can now stop pretending to be in camp (for the other continues the holiday in a tent). I have not heard his speech at the UN, nor have I seen the Minister Bond pay a lonely applause at ' Bedouin friend.

I did not follow the TV his trip to Pittsburgh and I could not see the face tense Obama while his wife gives the latest recommendations before contact with the human beast. I have not seen the pope intercept in an airport looking for a souvenir photo autographed, as I have not seen escort the pope to the aircraft steps, where hard-working Swiss Guards have vigorously dismissed before they embarked on the sly. I unfortunately also lost his last joke about Obama , but account not miss the next one, when at last he drew attention to the world that even the daughters of the American president in the fund are tanned.

short, it was a month of silence, peace and relaxation , broken only a few days before the September 29 setting up in this house of a handful of voices (including Don Bondio and baby-snake ) and putti Rubens, who prepared the song celebrating the 73rd birthday of my partner. An inspired text:

We are here for you, heart and soul, a Nobel peace
, Silvio is great.
We are here for you, unanimous chorus, one voice
, Silva is great.

This song slightly puttanesca was the birthday of Silvio Committee pro-Nobel . A cantargliela, il giorno del suo genetliaco, c'erano proprio tutti i suoi al completo. Tutti tranne il gregge di donnine in tubino nero e il loro pastorello signor Tarantini-o-Tarantino, per la grande delusione del mio balio che era stato preso da un febbrile allupamento da quando aveva sentito dire dai giudici che per il ruffiano esisterebbe il pericolo di reiterazione del reato.

E stata una festa come tante altre: i soliti filmini di Bush, i soliti discorsi muscolari del presidente più amato dagli Italiani, le solite mani lunghe, le reazioni sempre più stanche e i sorrisi sempre più dolenti delle palpeggiate di turno, i segni della croce di Telesina sempre più contrito dai pentimenti, i rutti di Giulianone. E come all other parties, the end is left alone in the dark, with the broken record of Apicella that ran dry. I made him turn on the computer to check my mail and inform me of what happened in the world during my vacation month in the media.

Ecce superman, the best premier the past 150 years. The dazed look on my telepathic conditioning had been established on some fantasy that was waiting beyond the screen of the computer , while his fingers on the keyboard performed my commandments. I wondered: what if the secret of his success was that despite his immense power, his allergy to the laws, those cows worldwide, rallies televisive e gli istinti insurrezionalisti ; se il segreto del suo successo fosse che nonostante tutto questo egli fa misteriosamente ancora pena al paese gattone?

Ahi serva Italia, di dolore ostello,
nave sanza nocchiere in gran tempesta,
non donna di province, ma bordello!

Ma devo lasciarlo risvegliare: aspetta a cena due giudici della Corte Costituzionale e quando quelli vengono si mangia sempre alla grande.

Monday, August 31, 2009

Blaze King Wood Stoves In Colorado

of religious wars, satiriaci chases, guns and holographic doctors impatient

Riprendo a scrivere in un momento di grande smarrimento religioso del mio cattolicissimo compagno. A farlo precipitare nell'agnosticismo sembra sia stata la prematura morte del suo padre spirituale di una vita, l'unico ministro di Dio che nei tempi d'oro del cavaliere cavalcatore sapesse concedergli per telefono anche una dozzina di perdonanze al giorno, praticamente una dopo ogni amplesso. Che apertura mentale, quale generosità umana in quell'umile sacerdote, capace di rimettere qualunque peccatuccio e peccatone . Altro che i prelati moralisti del giorno d'oggi, per i quali vale di più bacchettare il prossimo che sfamarsi dei piatti di lenticchie che generosamente gli si offre. A predicare il senso più profondo del Vangelo ("chi è senza peccato scagli la prima pietra") sono rimasti ormai solo i ciellini .

Già prima che il mio convivente dichiarasse guerra allo Stato del Vaticano per defend his sacred right to adultery, the circle of mercenaries at home had acknowledged his obsession with the sport as a pelvic issue of national emergency. It was his guardian Telesina decide drastic measures, one evening when the heat did debosciante outline of the show giulianone disabbigliato fleeing home in the corridors of the building to escape the most severe crisis to return satiriaco that my roommate had never had. On the other hand, even your doctor Azzeccaintrugli had warned us: "It will take several weeks to ensure that the cocktail of hormones horses iperprestazionali that I injected until a few days ago we dispose of: carefully cover up all over the naked body to any angle to the skin, in a regime of forced sexual abstinence as the one in which the patient is located, could lead to uncontrollable outbursts of fiery. "

I, who are all skin spellicciata, I gave now home to the reticence on the cupboards taller than the house, giving me just one night for a sneak raid fast snack. Telepathy is not on the other hand he assisted me more: thoughts monomaniacal vulvas dancing and the Amazon forests of pubic hair that had won a monopoly on poor simple mind and any attempt to mind meld with it would lead me to the brink of insanity. No, that brain sizzling fantasies horny was left to itself, and this explains my long absence from the network.

The two faithful companions instead of my partner had taken literally the particulars Azzeccaintrugli and each package had become a burqa to measure. Giulianone had been enlisted for a whole clandestine Chinese in Prato to meet its needs in size, but already after two days he and Telesina could move to the intricacies of the house as two gloomy shadows of Laurel and Hardy .

But then, unexpectedly, as every August, the heat came. High temperature and humidity conspired against the stifling disguise the odd couple and then began a slow strip-tease intended to last for days. Needless to say precisely the infinitesimal gradually stripped of this acted like a classic red flag in front of the bull. The first pieces of cloth were to fall, in order: the Telesina earmuffs and gloves, a veil to grate on the small face of giulianone, black shawl on the shoulders of Telesina, the beam's thighs prosciuttesche giulianone (my roommate began to drool), the bra fishnet of Telesina (popes tumbled back to the eyes), in The belly of giulianone latex (at that point my balio began to howl).

was in front of those intonations werewolves swollen big man gave himself up to the panic and He ran to the house, however, continues the striptease of the last rags still stuck to its great mass. So bouncing, swaying and trembling as gelatinous material, after about two hours of hit and run the pink flesh of the major causes in the poor Assatanate what was later diagnosed to be a Azzeccaintrugli priapic shock: my roommate had stiffened to attention with A smile from head to joke on his face, and there was no way to soften it. The half-naked

Telesina giobbesca reached the limits of his patience, then decided to overturn the terms of the game: instead of hiding the sources of temptation, he would have tried to hide the satyr incontinent. "I'll take care to represent them in political decisions," said the wise counselor. "As for public relations ... we use the holographic gun."

And so it was. As a center of attention chief district of the Senate from benefiting much insisted on a Sicilian farmhouse community of its nearly related, and very discreet retreat. While my roommate was restored in the country physical, and Telesina giulianone will rehabilitate the international image of the silent hologram making it bounce around the world. The two soon began well, displaying the Baths of Mességué version without cathartic harem in tow. But soon as the projector began to make the tantrums: already in the rubble Abruzzo its image is not stable, intervening as interference instead of merry Madonna invoked in prayer by the quake. Following the cannon projected on a viaduct of the Venezia-Mestre to bless motorists bottled under the sun in a white bathrobe to receive once also a legitimate son in the villa of pedo-party, in a summit between Putin and Erdogan unexpected as ceremonies. When he finally appeared also in front of Merkel sottosforzo toilet, the unlikely duo is convinced that much was enough and have turned off the machine. Fortunately, the original

had meanwhile completed his period of detoxification aphrodisiacs. We have reported a few days ago his new bodyguard, hired for the occasion at the farm and all linked by a nice Sicilian accent. In the beginning we had not recognized, but when they took the burlap sack over her head, in a liquid slurry of clay mixed with greasepaint has surfaced in his unmistakable smiling teeth. The stock did sit in an armchair and has also untied his hands. Then one of them took a cell phone and made a number. He put the loudspeaker. It was the doctor (remember ?).

"Can you hear me, ah? Can you hear me?"
"Yes, Doctor, loud and clear!" Telesina answered ready.
"Eh, this time I'll laugh intact. The next time that viriti potjebbe Macari mancaje some pieces. Shtiamo Here ingazzando own. After all the efforts to headlights passaje chidde nostje laws inteccettazioni , on tax shelter for the moneylaundery silently, without u popolu jivolti you, you fool chistu fottiri last slut services co nu registciatoje in his underwear, and sends everything sucks? Before you sputtanaje throughout Italy, ah? But to go and wash u Cacarica Culu a mari! mminghia And how do you think of the promises that we manteneje facist if teni nun vows? Giannuzzo mminghia but there shtai below you to chistu nano happy or not? "
" Yes, Doctor ... "
" We'll do you explain that de-legitimized in nu premmier nnente we need? "
" Yes .. "
" Avit understood that if the nun raddjizzate the situation facìemu secession? "
" Perfectly ... "
" I do not Giannuzzo fottiri ah, ca tantu goes to the water jug \u200b\u200bto be rump quanno nun.
"How true, doctor, I kiss your hands" .

Telesina After the phone call was shaking like a leaf. pale, without a word went on leave, saying he had to rest a couple of hours. But he had forgotten to tie my balio to prevent him from harming himself: within minutes he has recovered altogether, and ran into a prosecutor to complain that the newspaper had asked the questions, drawing the outrage of the world press . Then he gave the 'imprimatur a hoax drunk by Citizen Bergum like fresh water, which earned him the anathemas of the Church. When Telesina woke up, came to us saying: "I had a bad dream ...". No, it could not be that bad.

Sunday, July 26, 2009

Pokemon Platinum Happiness Action Replay

sexy-tapes, skeletons in cupboards, evidence of humility and childhood memories

of cats cat chat ask me from all over the world comment on the recordings made at home and published expressively. They want to know what's true. I would prefer to speak else, but I adapt to the single theme, curiosity and sexual phobia of foreign cats. But I feel that since the brain of my roommate at the time of complete chaos reigns, as happens when the overdose of pills are not allayed by a special blue gymnastics crotch, I can not milk them for information telepathically. Besides, I was not that famous night at home, having been taken away by thugs of the escort. So I can only stick to the news and make a few comments at liberty, pending the return of popes meninges legible.

I'll start by saying that the D'Addario files are doing more damage in Gaddafi's diplomatic niceties of home. I had not yet used to the camel in the hall, the gift of Colonel lezzoso desert yesterday when a team led by dismal transport Ius-Feratu , we unloaded a truck full of skeletons and skulls in the living room. In a hurry then they packed everything in the cupboards, emptied from the mountains of little baby-doll size 42 blacks who filled them up to two weeks ago. I have not served the examination of carbon-14 to understand that it was those poor Phoenicians at Villa Certosa stolen from their last sleep, interrupted by the revelations infiltration at the palace. Blessed is the Libyan two humps that SA continues to ruminate phlegmatic even in the face of such horrors.

What surprised me was the quiet agitation the hierarchy after the publication of the recordings. Basically now everyone knows that popes do not use condoms , a clear sign that it is pro-life . They would be welcomed oltretevere? And then also illegitimate grandson of Don Giussani, Fornicon , said with a laugh pious test humilitas that my roommate gave declaring coram populo not a saint. Even he, the king popes, the Vicar of Rocco Siffredi prostate implants with the folle additano come l'uomo della provvidenza. Quale modestia!

C'è chi insiste a dire che il mio convivente vada a prostitute per libidine personale. Ma negli audio clandestini lo si sente solo dare lezioni di politica internazionale e al più consigli di sessuologia digitale , mentre non lo si ode mai muggire un "uuh" o ragliare un "iih". E poi l'ha detto anche il suo amico intimo, Citizen Bergum , che senza prostata non c'è desiderio. E allora, mi chiedono gli indiscreti felini della cat chat , perché direbbe alle ragazze di aspettarlo sul lettone di Putin?

Ebbene, non va dimenticato che egli è un uomo generoso. E si è prefissato to try to even the hull of happy girls would feel the same emotions with "her man". How? The secret of his prostheses are interchangeable tips of different shape and stiffness: a goose, a silkworm, a pianist's finger, hand a boxer, a baseball bat and crowbar. In the course of an evening can get to try them all until the bencapitata I apologize. It usually happens too late, and most complain of pain the next morning at breakfast, as Patrick .

As for me, the desire remained, after reading the texts of the recordings, to know the ' leccatrice friend of my partner. Who knows it is also available jobs zoophilic. Although I apply daily to deretanofania years, no human has ever come to mind to give me at least once a reminiscence of slinguatine with which my mother clear the anus as a puppy. Let's face as well, including adult cats: make toilet yourself is not the same thing.

Sunday, July 12, 2009

Best Snomobile Modular Helmet

Men of honor and female dishonor

Contrary to what I wrote the ' last time, I finally decided to go together to Ambrose for Argentina, from which I returned yesterday after four weeks of real relax. But it was a simple journey: I am not yet ready for self-imposed exile to which it is given, happy, our ex-butler. He seems reborn, changed look and appearance and will now look like the best Julio Iglesias. Is about to open an agency of emigration and immigration in Buenos Aires: Argentina that will help those at home are harassed by law for financial crimes too severe to move into the paradise of freedom creative budget, where the penalties for fraudulent bankruptcy are mild ( if ever you are serving ) and be under investigation or convicted of helping the social ladder to parliament (and vice versa). At the same time assist those Italians who were tired of youthful freedom, wanting to spend their years of retirement to protect a peaceful civic environment, structured by certain rules. "It's kind of import-export human," he said Ambrose-Julio, stroking the hair pomade. "These are the advantages of globalization: everyone chooses the country where you plan to travel to get better, according to its nature."

he already knows that in Italy will never return. As a citizen of course, because as a tourist will come back for sure: the country is still beautiful, and will remain for at least another five generations of illegal building speculators, the most beautiful in the world. Returning to his homeland along with Ambrose, who had to recover his last things left in Italy, the window of the State messoci kindly provided by popes (with prior permission the prosecutor of Rome), viewers admired the beauty of our shores, the blue flashes of our lakes, the supremacy of the Mediterranean that still gets to lick the villages, which are the backbone of the Apennines to the peninsula, the relief whitewashed the Alps, and all of the monuments seem dumb, stood by, or not to lose sight of one another, boiled nell'assordante noise country cat, not abandoned the hope of peace : how heroes turned into real estate witnessing a timeless feel, where "our" is no more, no longer vibrate the beautiful soul, and true and false apply to much damage respectively to eat.

to convince me to leave for South America had been the historic interview of Patrick D'Addario, where the beautiful lady told with meticulous wealth of details of an evening spent here in my house and my roommate. Faced with such a chronicle ethics, to be envied by most of our own reporters, I was authorized to temporarily close eye on my "house daddy", especially since the lady has proven to know a lot more of me on my partner, besides being able to claim a biblical knowledge that Oedipus is that I do not possess. finally understood the reason for those mysterious kidnapping which was the subject of repeated Sometimes, at night and suddenly, when the gorillas Braccioni turn put me in a cage with dark curtains, to deliver after hours of round trips in the hands of the custodian of one of the villas of the popes. Apparently they were the cakes forbidden to myself, because the two meetings was usually allowed. I suspect that the presence of a cat sphinx predisponesse not willing submission to the girls that could inspire "the poodle licking their feet" seen by D'Addario. Evidently it was too, like the ring, an impromptu piece of furniture, as apart from the stains of urine (which I have always charged to the camel in the hall) has never left his trace.

Al mio ritorno ho trovato il mio convivente più stanco che mai. Più che il G8 lo sta sfinendo la ferrea astinenza sessuale a cui lo hanno costretto i suoi tutori, Giulianone e sua eminenza pokerista Telesina . Sembra che le abbiano provate tutte per placare la fame satiriaca di papi. Ma le bambole gonfiabili supertecnologiche fatte arrivare dal Giappone non sono programmate per eccitarsi davanti ai filmini di Bush e non hanno in memoria la canzone "Meno male che Silvio c'è". La contorsionista trasportata a palazzo dentro una valigia non può fare docce ghiacciate se non si vuole che un'artrosi le irrigidisca le giunture quando sarà il momento di rimpacchettarla per l'uscita di scena. E poi sempre si tratterebbe di monotoni scambi a due. Papi ha fame di torte.

Anche la speranza che a breve il paese gattone torni ad appassionarsi un po' più delle mitiche amicizie sicule del mio convivente, concedendogli così più libertà di manovra sul versante festini, sembra vana, come ha dimostrato la scomparsa di uno scoop notevole da tutta l'informazione virtual-cartacea d'Italia. E così per il momento dovrà accontentarsi di riempire la casa di uomini d'onore , anziché di femmine disonorate.

Friday, June 12, 2009

Staph Infection No Insurance

Nightmares and departures

Qualcosa deve avermi fatto male ieri sera. Non so se sia stato il cous-cous preparato dalle mani incerte del mio coinquilino per il suo amico nomadic, or wolfish glances with which it occasionally intercepted my eye while dinner was giving lessons on democracy to Minister Bond and Siculo Broker . A mind that's anything but simple Bedouin, impervious to my telepathic abilities, whole brain compared to other neurons of the weak clusters my partner and his entourage .

Whatever has been to upset, I had a nightmare night. I was watching a TV service on the news of the day, the approval of the House law against eavesdropping by the affirmative vote of twenty-one votes more than rubber-stamping ladies gift some irreducible dialoguing opposition. Fallen asleep, has begun a disturbing dream. We were at Villa Certosa, in the famous mansion of orgasms. giulianone , fully naked, he spoke in a dull, unidentified caller left Biotti himself as a sphinx cat, and gave him a heartfelt proposal: "If Berlusconi is welcomed it that only the press, there would be peace at last policy in Italy! Il Giornale newspaper could be the right and the left one sheet. All the other newspapers would no longer serve. Telegatto would be the King of Italy. " (At that moment, seen at great distance, the photographer perched Zappadu su un albero, nascosto tra le frasche, che sotto il teleobiettivo se la rideva...)

Mi svegliai di soprassalto. La conclusione della proposta del saggio ciccione, tanto inaspettata quanto incongruente, mi metteva di nuovo di fronte, dopo anni, l'immagine del felino catodico con la coda a forma di antenna, un mostruoso ibrido che è stato a lungo un mio incubo notturno ricorrente. Soprattutto nella sua forma di statuetta dorata ho sempre intravisto in lui un gatto spellicciato, finendo per identificarmici. È come specchiarmi in un Mr. Hyde dagli occhi ipnotici e il sorriso ebete, che si replica in migliaia di esemplari e salta di mano in mano a nani e ballerine.

Il Dr. Randolf, which at the time I made some psychoanalytic sessions via the Internet, claims that these nightmares are venting existential contradictions of my dream, that I unconsciously remove. Be the feline companion of an emperor of the ether, which is both head of state without opposition, according to the doctor cause of crisis of conscience that my feline would require me to refuse because of the quiet life at home. The Telegatto would then be generated for the image that unconsciously autopunirmi that not having to listen to my consciousness.

theories of psychoanalysis are always interesting but unverifiable. You suspect, however, that distressing beast reappeared now that the my partner, and, indirectly, my home, suffer the pains of a unprecedented crisis: a few weeks ago is gone Madonna Veronica with its perpetual yesterday, the family lost another member of the historical Butler Ambrose.

His real name is Giosino Ferrigno, but my partner has renamed Ambrose for the sake of the plates. He had come to the service of my balio since before I was born, more or less at the time of 'bargain of Villa San Martino. Liberal family (his grandfather had served Giolitti), has always had a conflicted relationship with his master, whom he considered a parvenu by vulgar ways, but seemed to have passed ogni riserva dopo un seminario di nicodemismo di due mesi in India nel 1995. In realtà, gocce giornaliere stillate dal signore facevano traboccare il vaso della sua autodisciplina. Ieri, finalmente, la rottura.

È entrato quasi in punta di piedi nello studio ovulare, dove il mio convivente stava giocando a strip Monopoly con una procace capitalista, e tenendo lo sguardo a terra ha annunciato le sue dimissioni. Il mio compagno ha allontanato la bella donna per concentrarsi su Ambrogio. "Tu quoque? Non sarai caduto anche tu vittima delle falsità della sinistra? Se ti servono ancora due mesi in India non ci sono problemi, lo sai". Ambrogio disse: "La ringrazio. Ma devo prendere una decisione. Not only for me but for my relatives in Argentina. As you know, they want to return some time in Italy, the land of our grandparents. She was also concerned to kindly send him Italian citizenship as soon as possible ...". "Well? A few questions? The bureaucracy is slow? Brunetta beats sluggish?. "" No, no, nothing like that at all! My relatives called me two days ago to tell me that you are putting all the best. Soon will the documents. "" So what's wrong? ".

" It seems to me that here in Italy it is worse than putting in Argentina ... Yesterday I told my parents the news of the day: a North African dictator who once protected terroristi internazionali ha parlato in un'aula del Senato della Repubblica inveendo contro gli Stati Uniti, e tirandole davvero una bella volata per il suo incontro con Obama lunedì. In serata è passata una legge che oltre a togliere alla magistratura inquirente uno strumento essenziale per la lotta contro la criminalità mette un bavaglio all'informazione come non ne esistono negli altri paesi democratici. La polizia ha nuovamente caricato degli studenti che manifestavano contro l'accoglienza festosa riservata al suddetto dittatore. A una studentessa che stava facendo una domanda è stato strappato il microfono dagli agenti di sicurezza".

"Quando gli ho raccontato queste cose, con l'animo pieno di tristezza, i miei parenti argentini sono rimasti a lungo in silenzio. Si sentivano solo in nostri respiri al telefono. Poi Giuseppe, mio cugino, ha detto: «No te preoccupe. Da mucho tiempo desideriamo riunirse e non sarà queto che noi fermerà. Domani vado a farte i documenti per diventare argentino. Vorà dire che quando ci arribano i pasaporti italiani, li stracceremo». Quelle parole mi hanno toccato il cuore. Ho visto la purezza e l'apertura di un paese giovane, forse più povero, ma anche più libero e gioioso. E ho deciso di partire."

"E va bene", ha commentato il capo. "In fondo ti posso capire. Le Argentine sono proprio bone. Magari ti vengo a trovare qualche volta. Ti chiamo prima così mi organizzi la compagnia femminile! Eh?". Ma Ambrogio ha tenuto lo sguardo a terra, senza più dire una parola. Poi si è voltato ed è andato in camera sua a fare le valigie. Stamattina l'ho seguito con lo sguardo nei suoi ultimi passi in questa casa. Arrivato davanti alla porta d'ingresso, ha esitato ancora un istante. Un ripensamento? No: si è voltato e mi ha guardato fisso negli occhi. Poi si è diretto verso di me. Per un momento mi sono visto in Argentina. Ma il bravo Ambrogio non aveva intenzione di rapirmi. Si è accovacciato davanti a me e mi ha detto: "È da un po' che seguo il tuo blog. All'inizio non ci potevo credere, ma una sera ho visto il belìno al computer, e quella sì che era una cosa davvero incredibile. Continuerò a leggerti da Buenos Aires, per sapere come stai e che aria tira da queste parti. Teniamoci in contatto via email, caso mai ti venisse voglia di evadere anche tu".

È stata la prima volta che Ambrogio mi ha parlato. Per riconoscenza ho socchiuso gli occhi per un paio di secondi. Poi l'ho accompagnato con lo sguardo alla porta, e l'ho visto scomparire dietro di essa. Allora mi sono alzato e sono andato a stravaccarmi sul divano, per recuperare le ore di sonno perse la notte prima.

Sunday, June 7, 2009

How Expensive Is A Dishwasher To Run

Gossip flattering, hospitality venereal excited and Czech Ministers Of Bond

Il mio coinquilino gongola di felicità: non si è mai parlato tanto di lui nel mondo. Inoltre, da ominide medio di sesso maschile e razza mediterranea qual è, si compiace che si alluda alla sua iperattività sessuale nella villa dei piaceri. Inizialmente aveva provato a negare tutto e a rifare la verginità alla tenuta commissionando un reportage naturalistico in cui posavo in tutta la mia glabra nudità. Era già pronto il titolo del servizio fotografico per i rotocalchi di famiglia: "Ecco l'unico nudo integrale di Villa Certosa". In seguito però, El Pais ha mandato il piano all'aria pubblicando dei culi al vento.

Ma questo, come dicevo, anziché deprimere ha ringalluzzito il mio balio, che si è visto dipingere dalla stampa internazionale come un maratoneta del sesso e un anfitrione d'altri tempi, quando i sovrani usavano provvedere alla goduria dei loro regali ospiti con sapienti cortigiane, con buona pace di chi non ha sangue blu per capire queste raffinate garbatezze.

A dire il vero ci sono stati due piccoli episodi che me lo hanno un po' infastidito. Innanzitutto non ha garbato l'esibizione erettile di Topolanek , che già lo aveva ossessionato a Villa Certosa con la sua competitività, culminata con la sfida a chi pisciava più lontano. In secondo luogo non gli è andata giù la maligna insinuazione del Sunday Times sulla sua presunta impotenza: "Gli scagnozzi di Murdoch adesso esagerano", si è sfogato. "Porco passi pure, ma impotente proprio no". E ha chiamato il Ius-Feratu , il funereo avvocato del diavolo, per ordinargli di aggiungere anche il giornale inglese alla lista dei quotidiani da querelare.

Intanto è tornato alla ribalta della cronaca il ministro Bond , di cui avevo già raccontato in passato il sogno di diventare il nuovo 007. È bastato che papi scherzasse su un complotto internazionale tramato ai suoi danni da un'organizzazione sovversiva guidata dalla sinistra italiana perché costui prendesse la balla al balzo e si incaricasse di rovesciare questa nuova Spectre , che avrebbe centrale a Fucecchio e ramificazioni nelle maggiori capitali d'Europa. Per stroncare la cospirazione ha fatto in modo che gli agenti nemici, abilissimi a camuffarsi da innocui studenti Erasmus , venissero impossibilitati a nuocere all'ordine costituito e ha dato ordine che fossero estromessi dalle liste elettorali per le Europee in Olanda , Francia e Finlandia .

Precauzione inutile, il coinquilino vincerà anche stavolta. Il paese gattone lo ama, e quando va a letto sogna di essere a Villa Certosa. Ma senza Topolanek.

Monday, June 1, 2009

Itraconazole For Dogs

photoshooting in Sardinia, domestic Guantanamo, tough questions and evasive answers

Sono stato via un po'. Sono tornato ieri da una vacanza a Villa Certosa, dove il mio coinquilino mi ha fatto portare in aereo blu per un servizio fotografico che apparirà sui tutti i suoi rotocalchi, quotidiani e televisioni a reti unificate. Vuole mostrare il lato ameno e naturalistico that now reigns in his kingdom of Sardinia, with that boundary of plants and animals that makes it a paradise on earth. So the country will make us forget the cat side naturist who reigned until now, where a bare outline of gnoccone made it a paradise for the senses of vintage men human males.

With regret I have learned from the newspapers of the times in which my partner would be removed from my telepathic conditioning to go to animate as the head of his harem-Sardinian feasts, passed off as a family to top diplomats. In all those occasions I was denied access to his mind, and then a simple internet . I hope that now that all Italy knows his hobby preferito, egli non cerchi più riparo in luoghi superprotetti come la Costa Smeralda o in remoti suburbi come la circonvallazione di Casoria, ma organizzi i baccanali direttamente a casa.

La settimana in Sardegna è stata piacevole: clima mite, molte prede da cacciare e gatte di ogni razza con cui amoreggiare. Sembra che il luogo emani un'energia erotica irrestistibile che manda in calore ogni essere vivente. Forse è la sua storia recente, forse sono le vibrazioni orgasmatiche dei satiracci che ne hanno calcato il suolo. Forse, più prosaicamente, è solo che il mio coinquilino ne ha irrorato l'ambiente con abbondanti dosi di gas afrodisiaci, che la tramontana non è ancora riuscita a spazzare via.

Al mio ritorno I discovered that someone else had been given a holiday of a different kind. The four brightest minds on the payroll of my roommate were joined to form a "crisis unit" to provide answers to difficult questions, far more demanding than those of the Mathematical Olympiad or "Who Wants to Be a Millionaire." These are the questions of the century: the 10 terrible questions of the Republic.

To encourage the concentration of the four essays, my roommate made them segregate for two weeks in the cellar of the house, transformed for the occasion in a Guantanamo home with lots of instruments of torture and prison warders of the original Cuban, now available at a good price su eBay dopo lo smantellamento del centro di detenzione ordinato da Obama. Sono arrivato giusto in tempo per vedere uscire i quattro alla fine del loro corpo a corpo con i dieci enigmi, del tutto irriconoscibili.

Giulianone sembrava reduce da un campo di digiuno nel periodo del Ramadan: i rotoli della panza sgonfi e cadenti fino alle ginocchia a formare una fisarmonica di carne disgustosa, il volto smagrito, gli occhi freneticamente alla ricerca di un panino al prosciutto. Neanche la tortura di Luttazzi lo avrebbe potuto segnare a quel modo.

Dietro al bestione si è profilata poi la vampirea sagoma del sacerdote delle leggi , l'inventore di lodi per il sovrano che oggi si intonano in vari tribunali della Repubblica. La faccia era quella di sempre: un calco bronzeo che dei fabbri-chirurghi hanno eternamente fissato in un ghigno sorcesco, capace di farmi avvampare di istinti predatori ogni volta che mi appare davanti. Ma a fronte di quell'inalterabile tegame battuto, i capelli bagnati e gli occhiali appannati tradivano una passione per il waterboarding . Infine è emerso Telesina , pallido dopo quindici giorni senza lampade UVA e con gli occhi incavati dall'oscurità, sorretto da una specie di varano che poi ho riconosciuto in una vecchia conoscenza dell'imperatore.

Scortati dagli ex-marines, i quattro sono stati condotti nello studio ovulare del mio convivente, che li aspettava col cipiglio di una sfinge (non immaginate quanto serio riesca a restare in privato). Felinamente, ho seguito la processione: non mi sarei mai perso la soluzione dei quesiti. Il cereo Telesina ha preso la parola per annunciare che nonostante due settimane di tentativi, l'unanimità non era stata raggiunta. Si sarebbe dunque proceduto con la presentazione delle soluzioni proposte da ciascun saggio separatamente.

Ha incominciato Giulianone, aspirando per prima cosa la dozzina di tramezzini che gli erano stati offerti per aiutarlo a riprendere le forze. Con la bocca ancora piena disse che non capiva dove stava il problema: "Ma chi ha detto che non si può trombare a seventeen year old? ". In a gesture of my living with the convicts in Guantanamo have immediately taken back to the cellar.

The floor was then a face of bronze. With air professional lawyer puts his hand to his clipboard briefcase and pulled out the applications for the Republic, he cleared his throat and began to read them one by one. He began by refuting the first with an essay by forensic bombast: "Come on, but it's there, but they are questions what to do, but go ahead, but come on, go there. "The second has an opposite hand," Come on, it is possible, but do me the pleasure, but it's there. "He had just begun to respond to the third when a more hand gesture of the head showed the guards that the lesson of rhetoric could go underground.

Telesina has lived up to its reputation as a dove: "There I talk with them to the Republic, there are so many of my former colleagues, you know. We agree the answers, you fix it a bit 'what you said to Vespa, say you altered in part the truth but only to protect the family Letizia. You make the figure of the hero who sacrifices himself for the weakest, Republic get satisfaction at the international press and we're all friends as before. " With an angelic smile Telesina dropped his gaze to the hand of the president, who this time did not move.

was then that I stepped in the monitor lizard. With dinosaurs ruled his wisdom: "You have already said of all embeh? je E mo nun say you never said noffink. Two plus two equals forty-eight, er award Arfan says.'re the emperor of Rome, you can burn and metterte playing at lira: you will come to barge ar applauded. Buttaje a bit 'de panem, mettije a bit' in de ciccenses tivvì that if they are boni boni. Hey, maybe for two or three months, the chicks to leave the Emijio Faith, who never see you sti Republicans follow from nerve ends with the camera strap. you do find Nun, nun you have to do is. You remember that you said je la Manna ? Made 'national holiday. "

the Sphinx's smile finally reappears at thirty denti. Congedò tutti e chiamo l'ANSA per dare al mondo la notizia del giorno: che lui non aveva mai detto niente. Niente di niente .