Dizziness From Vibrating Toothbrush

The slave of freedom

are two nights that keeps repeating the same scene: my roommate gets home semi-destroyed, trudging to the entrance supported by his gorilla, and then, as soon as he sees it, clings to the fido Ambrose, who drags him to the couch, there apparently falls into a sleep, disturbed by moans. After about half an hour the complaints begin to be structured into phrases, which become progressively less and less rambling. Fragments of a speech crystallize: every time a confession is the same mother Rosa.

"I'm tired, but, '" he sighed last night mean that it curled in a fetal position seemed small and old usual. "Tired of playing for others. Tired of showing my thirty-two teeth even when the increases of internal orthopedic shoes force me to walk on toes, inflicting terrible pain of the lotus feet. I'm tired of organizing parties to give an illusion of happiness and hope to a child forever and people without resources. Tired of idolize me as a Caesar, tired of being the subject of each question and each answer, the obsession, for better or worse, of all Italians. I'm tired of hear my words repeated like an echo from all of my deputies, senators, the aspiring racks, new Mastella kids and even from bombshells that have emancipated institutionally to save them from conviction of first wrinkles.

"I'm tired of representations of consensus sticky, tired of those studies dissent, tired of playing the role of the entrepreneur's success in the midst of the years when I have to fight debt like a lion against liberticidal laws to private citizens who seek more creative, like me. The policy makes me sick , but if I had been there, nobody would have saved me and my company by the state-monster, the common mechanisms of justice that look at the form and not substance, to respect human laws rather than subjective the creation of wealth and well-being objective. "

"I'm tired of hugging and kissing who does not put health at the top of my companies and myself just to prove that all are my friends and we live in a country which, except for the Bolsheviks, the and Executioner balls, joined in a friendly smile a bit 'dazed but very genuine, like that of Gerry Scotti. I'm tired of making speeches, to balance the books, the German pope is satisfied that the Italian people, courting old ministre Finnish and listen shrunken Lombard . If this is the price of globalization, I do not want to pay more. "

"I envy Veltroni, who is after me the largest parliamentary rich but nevertheless could still retire to private life and now devotes his time to write the biography of Obama told from the point of view of a village boy who dreams of one day becoming prime minister. I too would disappear from the political scene around the world and for once I can say everything that comes spontaneously from my mouth, even if it was not shake at all in my brain, without having to see then taken for a ride by Orbe terraqueous newspapers.

Then he got up and limped reached the toilet of rosewood for the ritual function of the tissues. detergerva While the greasepaint, already a bit 'undone per il pomiciamento con Fini e lo struscio facciale sul divano, il veder riaffiorare il suo vero volto nello specchio lo ha risvegliato del tutto. È stato come se lo investisse il coraggio del maratoneta all'ultimo chilometro di gara.

"Mammina, tu me lo dicevi sempre: «lasa stà, faà no el matt, sta no lì a entraà in pulitica che te capiset un caso! Sta a cà tua e pensa a la tò mama che l'è vegia!». Le tue parole, così affettuose e protettive, le parole di una mamma verso il figlio che ha il vizio di sopravvalutarsi sempre, mi avrebbero potuto garantire un esilio dorato come quello dell'amico Bettino. Ma i miei beni non erano modesti e liquidi come i suoi, e una fuga mi avrebbe richiesto preparativi too long, while the Milan judges had already discovered several ideucce my business that is not framed in their legal thinking. "

" Perhaps it was madness, and not so polished, fifteen states to get involved in this messiah, savior of the fatherland, as a crusader against the Communists who were now almost extinct. But I never thought it would last so long. I just wanted to gain time, and now I find myself the only man in the country to which the Italians can or want to believe. For years, I'm desperately looking young professional politicians who pass the baton, but there are no more Andreotti, the Fanfani, the Cossiga. I appear before only half cleats o le ragazze brave a letto. Gente che sa solo ripetere gli slogan che io ho sempre ripetuto per prendere tempo, dando l'impressione di crederci sul serio. Le nuove generazioni sono vuote: hanno preso il travestimento ideologico che mi serviva per nascondere dei piccoli tatticismi opportunistici per una vera idea politica. Ma non capiscono che non si può guidare un paese per più di quindici anni semplicemente attaccando i giudici e i comunisti".

"Mamma, ho paura che non potrò mai andare in pensione. Non vedrò mai il mio successore. Il pensarci mi dà lo stesso fremito di paura che oggi solo i papi possono provare. Ormai sono diventato storia. Non volevo, volevo solo essere lasciato in pace. Ma ormai è troppo tardi".

were his last words last night. This morning he woke up early. He repeated the speech in front of the mirror was held today, trying all the poses as statesman. He did exercises the muscles of the mouth to be able to display the full teeth several times a minute. Then he went to Congress. He returned a short while ago, less tired than usual. He is sprawled on the couch and started over the old story: "Mom, how disgusting work."

Bam Margera Tetovanie

Cat Hunting

Yesterday me have gotten a bad rap. Only two days ago in post which examined the effects of the ban on writing on the Internet anonymously, I observed that most human beings do not believe cats capable to maintain a blog , albeit through the telepathic control of its human companion simple-minded. I did not suspect that it is precisely the 'inspirational gommificata exception of the new law did.

I had got to know the virulence of this lady dominatrix observed in one of my favorite TV programs . But, as they say, television sometimes does not do justice to reality, and that I had a test yesterday morning. The Amazon rubber occurred in front of our house harnessed from head to toe for a fox hunt: tight white pants, red jacket, boots to the knees, black bob and whip. Our Ambrose il fedele maggiordomo avvizzito per l'età e una decennale pratica nicodemica alla corte del mio coinquilino, ha aperto la porta e per lo spavento la pelle della faccia gli si è tesa al punto che per un momento gli sono scomparse tutte le rughe, rendendolo più glabro della donna di cera che gli stava di fronte. La domina gli ha fatto sibilare il frustino sotto il naso e con il labbrone proteso gli ha intimato: "Voglio parlargli immediatamente!".

Ambrogio, che nel frattempo aveva ripreso l'aspetto tartarughesco di sempre, si deve essere allora chiesto perché questa fiamma passé del mio convivente avesse deciso proprio oggi e dopo anni, con un bilancio tra favori dati e ricevuti tutto sommato non deficitario, di fargli una scena di gelosia in casa sua. "Rispettabile signorina, il cavaliere è assente", ha cercato di placarla. Ma lei: "Non cerco Sua Maestà" (sic!) "voglio parlare al gatto!". A quel punto il povero Ambrogio cominciò a prendere paura. Sudando, si spremeva le meningi per trovare una via di uscita, ma metà della sua concentrazione era impegnata a fargli schivare il frustino impazzito della cacciatrice. "Come scusi? Il gatto?" domandò trafelato tra una scudisciata e l'altra. "Sì", ripeteva la signora, "e immediatamente!".

Di fronte alla determinazione dell' ex-soubrette , Ambrogio capì che ella non scherzava affatto e provò a farla ragionare usando il comune human argument that cats are incapable of understanding the language of man. But the tamer began one of his monologues shouted that consist of very few words repeated endlessly: "I want to talk to the cat, I want to talk to the cat, I want to talk to the cat and I'm not leaving here until I can, I want to talk to cat! Voglioparlarealgatto! Voglioparlarealgatto and diquinonmenevado! VoglioparlarealgattoVoglioparlarealgattoenonmenevado! vogliovogliovogliovogliovoglioparlareparlareparlareparlarealgattoalgattoalgattoalgattoalgatto ... "

"ALRIGHT!" Ambrose then shouted in despair. And surrendering the joint attack of words and whippings, the door flew open and liberating said: "And talk with the cat then! And my kind regards to both the three little pigs and the ugly duckling sees them discuss the corridor. Just do not bother me in the living room where the two leocorni are playing cards: they become angry and they start pissing everywhere and swearing at Noah. "

I could not believe: Ambrose had raised the white flag and I had put in great danger save himself. In a moment I took my resolution: I would appeal to the nails only as a last resort , because there was a risk that break once sunk in the compact is coated in silicone rubber lady. First I would instead given to a strategy popular with cats, but it requires a great dose di sangue freddo: fare l'indiano con sguardo sornione e con la flemma disarmante di chi non ti capisce perché è troppo superiore a te. Comunque, per sottrarmi all'allungo del frustino e anche per metterla in una condizione di sudditanza psicologica, pensai bene di salire in cima alla palma nana in soggiorno, che è alta circa quattro metri.

Quando me la vidi davanti capii quanto pericoloso possa essere il lavoro delle Iene a volte: non guarderò mai più i loro servizi senza provare per loro una solidarietà animalesca. Per fortuna la distanza era ben calcolata: nonostante provasse a raggiungermi zompando sotto la palma come una cavalletta impazzita, col frustino riuscì solo a sfrondare i rami un metro under my nose while whining "I want to pay for the damage, I want to pay the damages." Desperate for his impotence, lowered his whip, and began with his monologues deafening. I knew that this would be the most difficult test, but I felt ready.

began to insult me \u200b\u200bfor my blog , spitting venom against me and the cats surfers from around the world, promising to pass a law against cats blogger providing for their years of cat shelter on bread and water. Among the epithets that I overthrew him, one was repeated for several minutes: wrinkled. It is an observation that I usually sinks into a great sadness, because the appearance that the man antropofelino I imposed, depriving them of fur with genetic manipulation, has always made me feel different from my fellows. But this time, looking at the plastic face and free from wrinkles to this fifty who insulted me, I found the courage to continue the recitation of my empyrean aplomb.

Indeed, at that point I could even give her the coup de grace: yawned. Faced with this final showdown, the tamer of beasts fell silent, his whip and his s'ammosciò labbrone deflated. Just then, the reinforcements called by Ambrose plunged into the living room: two made of the Chamber of Deputies, dressed for the occasion in a white coat, accompanied Mr lady in his office. C'era una legge urgente che necessitava delle sue correzioni, le dissero.

How Much Wrapping Paper Do I Need

of felines in anxiety, learned dominatrixes, identity anonymous and managers in bra

La comunità degli internauti felini è in subbuglio. A scatenare l'agitazione è la proposta di una compagna di ideali libertari e di chirurghi plastici del mio coinquilino, un'animatrice del dopolavoro di Montecitorio specializzata nel ruolo di domina . È una signora la cui vasta cultura spazia dalla fisica delle particelle alla legislazione su internet , materia sulla quale si è affacciata da poco ma che grazie al suo eclettismo e a consulenti segreti ha già domato.

L' idea consiste nel vietare "l'immissione the network content in any form (text, audio, audiovisual) in an anonymous ". cybernauts cats suddenly find themselves having to answer the existential questions posed by identity dominates, while the majority of human beings remains convinced that no animal except man is capable of self-consciousness. We therefore faces a self-righteous trap: if we continue to sign as we are not cats believed by skeptics to two feet and draws us to hide behind the accusation fairytale characters, but if we invent a human identity, or even take a loan that of our medium simple-minded, we are liable for misrepresentation or deceit.

In addition, some cats have gained an enviable location on the network by exploiting the anonymity and pretending to be humans. What would happen to these prophets of the modern era, holders of frequented blog, if you find out that cats are just helpless? And what would happen to their passionate human readers, many of whom have already made drastic life choices listen to the advice on their sites, and threw clothes manager to go for those who drag queen in Australia , who is the seller of peanuts in Madagascar? In short, there is the danger from legislative whip Dominatrix will trigger an earthquake.

I gatti più pragmatici disdegnano queste speculazioni filosofico-giuridiche e si concentrano sul problema tecnico: come si può certificare l'identità di chi interagisce in rete? L' indirizzo IP non è sufficiente, perché è utilizzabile da più persone, anche da centinaia nel caso degli internet point . Forse la signora in guêpière e i suoi consulenti in latex hanno in mente una banca dati contenente l'identità di tutti gli utenti di internet? E dove sarebbe posto il portale dove il cerbero ministeriale vigila affinché entri solo chi ha un'identità certificabile? Questi gatti Tech-Freak concludono che l'idea è inattuabile and condescendingly dismiss the fears of many of their like.

For me, I have no influence: I will continue to sign with my naked face, and the anonymous way of Felino, as the official name of my host family saddled me is a masterpiece of idiocy does not publishable . If then the domain will have something to argue, will have to have the family pack leader. He always liked the little women are aggressive.

Fetish World Belly Punch

of exotic travel, wandering king, noble savages and dreams of exile

feline friends to apologize for my long silence, but last week my human prosthesis has suddenly embarked on a long journey relaxing that has touched several continents. Unfortunately, the scarcity of other simple-minded family left me with no perpetrators of my telepathic commands, then with his mouth closed. As explained

's last , the positivist character and a bit' Dionysian my roommate is incompatible with the 'jinx air that blows in Italy for some time. This forces him to pilgrimages to exotic lands increasingly rare in the global world, where the so-called civilization has not yet cleared the primitive instincts of 'homo sapiens ensnared in a mesh of unnatural duties.

Last night it fresh fresh to return from his trip with a double-Saharan Africa, a tan that rivals the U.S. President and synthetic hair full of sand. "I am the desert," he said proudly, folding the top of his head towards me and his wife, who were silent on the couch. I have only glimpsed something like a mat car crushed after a trip to the beach.

was very excited and began immediately to tell his new best friend, a wandering Libyan military that for forty years living in a tent and from there controls a nation. The excitement took him in particular to the memory of the concubines of the nomad, twenty beautiful scantily clad costumes in the air, dragging him into a feverish belly dancing time around ten seconds, that is, until a lumbago has not intervened to calm him down. During all the time, the wife of my friend looked at in a vacuum with no expression.

"A dreamland," said orthopedic escalmato sitting in the chair, his face imprinted with the same tender smile that boyish check when reading the comic adventures of Salgari. "A virgin land, where men can be satisfied with what their prime minister bestows them. He can decide freely for the good of the people, without always having to convince its reasons defeatist half of the country. There the judges know them to him without its limitations should be explained by specific laws. Televisions are free as they once were in Italy, before the the Communists monopolized. The premier year-round living in a tent as if it were on holiday: no need to retreat into a villa impregnable, where grooms trusted to defend it by hordes of young Bolsheviks Reeks, or mechanized admirers. Women are bought instead of camels with jewels and ministries, and the football team wins all the premier league. "

Then his wife got up and without saying a word, he vanished in a dark corner of the home. I was dying to get him to telepathically connect to the Internet immediately to resume writing on my blog , but the butler was in the area and I knew that seeing his master to use the computer would have caused the poor, which is infarcted, the same shock of seeing a monkey fly a nuclear submarine.

"It is a country thriving economy," he hung up, "because people's entrepreneurial spirit. They are not whiners like the Italians. Is there a crisis? Ghe I think, says the Libyan! But here all factories to close because the workers want gentlemen agreements in good standing. No, Libya is submerged, and no taxes, and the economy flies. I still talk to Giulietto . But that there is more difficult to convince Ancelotti. "

's monologue lasted several minutes, during which I have granted multiple naps thanks to the monotony of his chanting Monza, when suddenly I was awakened a few words. "Yes, my friend knew a lot Bettino, when he left this country to go to North Africa. Ah, the colonel I've already said, if there are up once again the Communists, I do not remit more to buy seats with senators and dancers. now what age when you Grandpa. And then you go all in Libya. I already have a tent to fourteen floors, inside a mausoleum, near the pyramids. Well, how about cat? A cat naked like you who suffer from the cold, the heat of the desert would only good! "

I am seen to share a trough with a camel and I could not stand it any longer: I've silenced telepathically and I removed all the neuronal connections associating the flight from Italy to Libya. Now when hollowed out expatriates think more than anything else the Riviera. But the fascination with Libya and its leader has not left wandering. Today, heartened by the optimism of the Bedouin, made his reappearance in the land of the unemployed re-launching the idea of \u200b\u200bgrand bridge across the Straits. screening telepathic One told me he is already contemplating a bridge between Lampedusa and Tripoli.